SURVIVOR: JOSEPHINUM

Well, this is my 39th full day at the Josephinum and I have not been voted off the island. The longest I have ever been away from the Nashville area before now was the three weeks I spent alone in Mexico one summer. I am now about 2.5 weeks past that. If this really were survivor, I'd be trying to convince the jury why I should be the $1 million winner tonight. Tonight would be the last night. But this is far from my last day here. I have hundreds in front of me.

But it's not really Survivor, and that is an important thing for guys to keep in mind. The formation faculty is not waiting to pounce on the opportunity to kick a seminarian out. They are not waiting for you to slip up. They don't want to see you fail. They see it as their job to help you overcome and remove obstacles to ordination. And the goal at the end of this journey is far greater than Survivor's: not money, but the priesthood of Jesus Christ.

It's only been 40 days since I left home, but it seems so long since I've seen home or family. It seems like quite some time since I've seen my friends. I would not say that I am homesick, but I am starting to miss people. But there are always reminders of home. There is a Monsignor from home here. The bishop is here today and will be taking us out for dinner tonight. My mom and aunt are coming to see me this weekend, and it's only two weeks until my short fall break, during which I will be flying home.

So, yes, this will be a long and difficult journey. It will be a profoundly spiritual one in which I will encounter both joys and hardships. I will have to give up much, but I will gain more. Even if I don't make it through, I haven't lost. I will discern God's will here and will be secure in the knowledge that He will not lead me astray as long as I am trying to do His will. I have joked with my friends that these years are my exile, but the truth is that they are my time to go out into the desert and grow. It's very comforting to know that I am not alone in the desert and that I don't have to (and shouldn't) rely only on myself here. I have an "alliance" with all my brothers here, my spiritual director, and the formation faculty to help get me through. Not to mention the prayers from folks back at home, including the St. Cecilia Dominicans! But if I make it to ordination, I will have to remember that it is not I who chose this, but God who chose me. That will be the determining factor. If this is God's plan I think it will happen. If not, I think I will be back home sooner than 2013.

There are definitely parallels to Survivor, but in this adventure you don't have to lie, cheat, steal, plot and backstab to win. In fact, your chances of success are far higher if you don't.